Couples: Unlocking The Power Stuggle
An online and home-study continuing education course.
Chapter One
Presenting problems and how they reveal each individuals core issues. Clients usually have a story to tell. These stories reveal the core wounds that are driving conflict and upset in the relationship.
Chapter Two
Learning how to shift from what couples talk about to how they are talking. Couples are often so caught up in why they are upset they have become unaware of how they are treating each other. They feel justified. Therefore, how they behave - yelling or blaming or withdrawing or hitting etc. is okay. When therapists move the focus to how these behaviors impact their partner the session moves to a deeper level of work.
Chapter Three
Using yourself as a powerful therapeutic tool in the couples' session. The therapist, herself, is a powerful tool in the session. Everything the therapists says and does creates a reaction in the clients and thus is an enactment. Knowing this and using it appropriately as a tool becomes a powerful force in the work.
Chapter Four
Educating - what, when and how to teach couples. One of the tasks in relationship is taking responsibility for one's thoughts, feelings and actions. Recognizing and working with these aspects of self requires the development of an adult awareness that can think clearly, self nurture, soothe and manage one's own behavior. Educating clients about how things work and how to do certain tasks is crucial for the development of the adult self.
Chapter Five
Complaints - working with the individualissues and bringing them back to the relationship arena. Individuals express their pain in the form of complaints. Exploring these complaints; connecting them to the individuals core issues; and then bringing them back into their impact on the relationship is an ongoing process with couples.
Chapter Six
Using communication skills to create structure and promote individuation. Couples need to talk about many things when you are not around. Teaching them the steps in good communication gives them a crucial skill for communicating respectfully and effectively at home. In session these skills are very useful in creating a structure that reduces reactiveness and invites individuals to think and act separately while seeing and understanding their partner.
Chapter Seven
Teaching couples how to share their truths. Often what's missing in relationships is the truth. Once couples have entered the power struggle stage of their relationship it feels too risky to tell each other their deepest truths. Instead they placate, blame, withhold and deny in an attempt to stay on top and stay safe. Sharing their truth is the doorway to acceptance and intimacy.
Chapter Eight
Teaching couples to work with anger. Anger is always present in relationships. It is expressed in many ways - sarcasm, teasing, forgetting, ignoring, pretending, yelling, blaming, withholding, name calling, and hitting, to name a few. Each individual's style has it's roots in their family of origin and is often an automatic reaction to threat. Teaching couples to become aware of their anger style and then learn to express it more positively is an important part of couple work.
Chapter Nine
Using SWING in your work with couples. SWING is an acronym which stands for: sharing, wondering, inviting, naming and guessing. These are powerful techniques for the therapist to use when working with couples.
Chapter Ten
The role of attachment and expectations in couple work. Couples experience a lot of the power struggle in their relationship around their individual attachments and expectations. It is important to help each individual understand these and work with them individually as well as in relationship with their partners.
Chapter Eleven
Self-esteem issues and how they affect individuals in their relationships. How each individual feels about themselves has a lot to do with how they see themselves and how they function in relationship to their partner. Low self-esteem is often linked with high reactivity, substance abuse, domestic violence and dependency issues.
Chapter Twelve
The Victim, Rescuer, Perpetrator triangle in couples. This triangle is common in relationships. It is also a powerful dictator of roles which keep individuals from experiencing intimacy with self and other. Recognizing these roles and teaching couples to get out of the triangle is powerful work for couples.
Instructor Susan Aiken, LMFT blends active therapy techniques with educational/behavioral techniques and has created a unique way of working with couples. A teacher of parenting classes and communication workshops since 1980, she is in private practice in Los Gatos
For Continuing Education Credit:
- Sign up and pay for the whole 12-chapter course
- Read the material.
- Answer the questions after each chapter and email them as indicated.
Once your registration has been received for this online class, we will email you instructions for accessing the class material online.
The course earns you 6 units once you finish all twelve chapters. We do not give partial credit.
6 CEUs: $100
Refund info
You can register to audit the course and just read the material without answering any questions.
Licensed or pre-licensed audit: $30 Zero (0) CEUs
No refunds
This class is also offered as a series of regular continuing education classes at Process Therapy Institute in Los Gatos.
This course meets the qualifications for 6 hours of continuing education credit for MFTs and/or LCSWs as required by the California Board of Behavioral Sciences.
Go to registration form
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